A cure for the hungover

Smashed, sloshed, gone-zo, boggled: there’s a cure for it all

The morning after isn’t enjoyable for anyone.
Photo: 

The first week of school, Alehouse & Canteen announcing Tuesday country theme nights, and moving back in with your best friends sounds like a recipe for, well, alcohol. With a recipe always comes a remedy, so I present to you: hangover cures.

I mourn the days I could party all night and wake up the next morning feeling amazing. Hell, I’d even go for a run bright and early, grateful I wasn’t among my half-alive groaning friends who were begging me for a Tylenol. Those were the days…

Now, here I am, suffering among the masses. The positives? I have a wicked list of hangover cures that actually work. 

Gatorade

While drinking a ton of water is so important Gatorade is too. It not only gives your taste buds a fun wake-up call, but it also gives you a ton of electrolytes. It’s a small boost of energy rather than the lowly water that seems almost difficult to drink in such a state of despair. 

In between your glasses of water—and I truly mean glasses, not sips—grab your favourite coloured Gatorade (blue is the most elite and any other answer is wrong) and remind yourself there are still alcohol-free fun drinks.

Carbs—but specifically, bananas

For all my girls who reject carbs, y’all aren’t going to love this one, but unfortunately, it has to be done. Anyone who knows me well knows my go-to food to soak up the alcohol in my system is toast.

You need a hefty carb, like bread, crackers, or a sandwich that can settle your stomach. I know you want to say that Pizza Studio will help, or maybe even a burger, but I hate to break the news: it’s a total myth that greasy food soaks up alcohol—greasy foods aren’t soluble in water.

Instead, have a banana! Bananas contain fiber and they help with digestive issues—so if your stomach is flipping, they may calm it down a bit—and they’re great for levelling out your potassium.

Ginger/Ginger Tea

Is standing up too fast feeling like you were just on a roller coaster that did one-too-many loopty-loops? I’ve been there. A trick that most people don’t talk about is either eating ginger
or having ginger tea.

After doing some research, I found out ginger has natural properties that help with indigestion, nausea, and other hangover symptoms. Now, please don’t start eating a ton of ginger—that will probably make you feel worse—but ginger tea is definitely a possible option for mending the sickness.

Tylenol, Advil, or Ibuprofen

If that pounding alarm in your head is too painful to deal with for the next 24 hours without any help, then Tylenol, Advil, or Ibuprofen is your best friend. Only take one of the options—please not all three.

Personally, an extra-strength Tylenol works best for me. Take one every four to six hours and by the end of the day (6 p.m. to 8 p.m.) you should be relieved of the banging in your head. 

At that point, feel free to make yourself a smoothie. No noise irritation, plus you’re nourishing your body with fruits and protein.

Sleep

Naps are the best when you’re badly hungover. Your body is exhausted—you just tore up the dance floor all night while literally poisoning your body for a few hours. Your body can’t combat the discomfort you’re feeling when it’s exhausted from the night before.

A nap works wonders. Sleeping not only helps you escape the awful feeling of being hungover, but it also gives your body a chance to regroup and rejuvenate itself after the terrible way you treated it, hours prior.

***

This strongly curated list can only go so far. Frankly, if you’re so hungover that you’ve Googled this, have done all the above and still feel awful, there may be nothing else I can do for you.

At the end of the day, you have to just soak in the pain you’re feeling. I hope you feel better though. 

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