We’re so caught up in the digital world we barely make time to connect with people in real life.
Third places have become an almost mythological concept. We hear about the friend group gatherings of the ’90s from watching eccentric characters in shows like Friends and How I Met Your Mother magically find time every day to meet at coffee shops and bars just to hang out and chat.
We watch these shows for their comfort and coziness, wishing we were back in a time where third places—social spaces outside of school, work, and home—were easily found on any corner.
With our world becoming increasingly digitized, it’s hard for many of us to even picture that concept. The rise of social media, particularly apps like TikTok and X, have resulted in many social connections being formed or maintained through screens. Most people no longer go to coffee shops to catch up with friends—instead, we just open our devices and easily connect with anyone we want to speak to.
To revive third places, we need to make a conscious effort to step away from virtual communities.
That’s not to say it’s easy to dedicate time from your day to just talk to people. With the stress of work and school, the difficulty of finding establishments open after 5 p.m. in smaller cities and towns, and the rising cost of a cappuccino, it’s become difficult for us to engage with our friends and family in person. Physical spaces are bested by the ease and comfort of digital communication.
Yet, staying complacent and confined to our devices doesn’t help, either. Studies show that third places have benefits on psychological well-being and mental health, while social media often exacerbates feelings of isolation. To get the social support we need, we must actively seek it rather than waiting for it to come to us.
So, ask your friends to meet up at the local library—a free and accessible space—and study together from time to time. If you can’t justify spending money on ridiculously priced coffee at a café, that’s fine too. Find a coffee shop near you that doesn’t require you to purchase something to sit there. People watch, gather up a few of your friends, or brave the fear of interacting with someone new.
Make a habit out of stepping outside your comfort zone away from your phone, and you might be the lucky member of a new physical community—one that doesn’t consist of names and avatars on a screen.
We can’t keep longing for community from a distance. It’s time to grab the reins ourselves.
Aya is a first-year Health Sciences student and one of The Journal’s Assistant News Editors.
Tags
community, isolation, Social connection, third spaces
All final editorial decisions are made by the Editor(s) in Chief and/or the Managing Editor. Authors should not be contacted, targeted, or harassed under any circumstances. If you have any grievances with this article, please direct your comments to journal_editors@ams.queensu.ca.